you guys were way drunker than both of me
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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