I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
