I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
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