Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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