"it" just moved
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
