You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize