Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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