So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
