He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
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