I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
