I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize