Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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