You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
