well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
