Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
