She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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