sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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