so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Randomize
