I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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