just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
They left me at home... I'm a liability
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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