I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
