Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
