Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
