The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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