I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
