What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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