She said her name was "party"
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
