Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
