Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
