dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
