Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
If I die, sorry about rent.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
