This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
My ass is underappreciated
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
