She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
