Swine flu. Run for my life!
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
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