I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
