This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
