jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
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She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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