normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
