So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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