it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
I'm having to shit out rocks
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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