You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize