Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
