The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I wish i was in the wii world.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Verdict: uncircumcised.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
