She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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