After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize