Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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