I need help removing her.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize
