I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize