I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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