How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
