Non-Jews are for practice
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
